What is meant by well of death?

Some years ago, I helped tend to a friend of mine who was dying of cancer. Near the end of his life, he had reached a place of equanimity around dying. But instead of honoring his wishes for a peaceful death, his doctors ordered aggressive chemotherapy treatment, which did nothing to halt his cancer. The treatments caused him immense suffering, rendering him unable to sleep, eat, or converse with family and friends as he was dying. Unfortunately, deaths like my friend’s are not that rare. Though more than 70 percent of Americans surveyed say they want to die in their own home without unnecessary procedures to extend their lives, 50 percent of all deaths occurs in facilities away from home. Of those, 40 percent occur in ICU’s, where physicians are charged with doing everything they can to keep a person alive, regardless of the outcome. From the GGSC to your bookshelf: 30 science-backed tools for well-being. Sometimes, the quest to avoid death can seem extreme, like in the much-publicized cases of Terry Shiavo and Marlise Munoz, where unnecessary life-extending procedures created exorbitant medical bills and emotionally burdened their loved ones. But, if Shiavo and Munoz are examples of a bad death, is there any better way? Is a “good death” just an oxymoron? Or can the experience of death be far more positive—an opportunity for growth and meaning? Listening to the dying These are questions that I first began to consider when I was a young psychologist at the oncology unit a...

13.6K The leading grief expert’s new book goes beyond the five stages. David Kessler was introduced to death young: As a 13-year-old boy, he witnessed a mass shooting in New Orleans just days before his mother succumbed to a long illness. His grief pointed him toward what would become his life’s work. In the decades that followed his mother’s death, Kessler immersed himself in the fields of palliative care, bioethics, and trauma response. He worked with countless grievers to help them through their pain, and he coauthored five bestselling books sharing what he learned along the way, including the landmark Kessler’s latest book may be destined to become his best known. Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Griefgoes beyond the familiar idea of “acceptance” of a death to focus on how finding meaning in a loved one’s loss is what most deeply helps people heal. In exploring how this works, Kessler opens up for the first time about the loss of his own son to an overdose, and how even as a grief professional, he feared for a time his suffering might never end. On Monday, October 28, Legacywill host David Kessler for a book signing at the NFDA International Conference & Expo in Chicago, where attendees will be able to meet him and receive a free autographed copy of Finding Meaning. Meanwhile, we’re proud to present the following excerpt from Finding Meaningabout the power of funerals to help people process the meaning of a death. Grief Must Be Witnessed (from Funerals and memorials...

The Church and death There is a natural longing in the human heart for peace, friendship, love and happiness – for a life that is purposeful and worthwhile. And there is an even deeper longing, sometimes quiet or hidden. This longing is to discover the ultimate meaning of life, to know the love of God, and to share in a destiny beyond the horizon of death. As St Augustine of Hippo, one of the great teachers of the Church, wrote: “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.” The Christian understanding of death is inseparable from the Christian understanding of life. It’s worth summarising some of these key Christian beliefs. The reality of death In God’s plan, human beings were created for holiness and eternal life with him. But through the original sin of our first parents, our nature has been wounded, and we experience suffering and death. This was not part of God’s original plan, but it is part of the reality of our lives now. On the one hand, in purely natural terms, death is a frightening mystery. We are stripped of all our attachments to this world; our body lies corrupt; and our immortal soul goes to meet the Lord. We will see the whole truth of our lives, and we will face God’s judgment. The hope of eternal life On the other hand, Christians who have faith can approach death with peace and trust. There is a longing to be ‘at home’ with the Lord. They have the hope of eternal life and the knowledge that Christ has alrea...